Brooklyn Heights was a sight to behold today, what with children in snowsuits splayed across the sidewalk and commuters making like Balanchine over wet curbs. This reporter not only hit every red light when crossing, but didn’t miss a single dirt river. (In sneakers, yay!) I was never so happy to see Metro Tech in my life.
My journey then took me to that cozy part of Gold Street known as the 84th Precinct. Upstairs in Crime Analysis, I was shocked to discover that after all that schlepping, there were only three cases on file – and for the record, none involve iPod thefts on the F train or locker room shenanigans at Planet Fitness. Behold:
At 5:30 p.m. Monday, a woman was bumped on the sidewalk in front of 115 Court Street, and soon discovered her wallet and $400 missing.
Several hours earlier at 81 Washington St., the management who opened up Pomme saw that the register was gone along with $100.
Finally, the register tray at the Henry St. Tazza was stolen in the wee hours of Sunday night. The take? $15. And that’s this week’s blotter. Now if you don’t mind, I’m off to be treated for the consumption.