Watch Karl Cover Kiehl’s Kickoff On Montague Street In Brooklyn Heights

Mr. J. was on hand with cam Friday for the grand opening of Kiehl’s Montague Street store.

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  • AEB

    I was there for the opening–half unwittingly. Truly, an advertisement for the end of the human race. Lines to get in for the 4:00 opening–lines! In BH! To get into a store. In BH!

    Once in the packed, and I mean, packed, store, I attempt to get the one product I’d come for. People are eating free food as if they’ll never eat again. Poignantly, older people have piled there plates sky high. People with baby carriages (!) are frozen against one wall, waiting to be able to move into the “action.”

    Three women are already in reclining chairs awaiting beauty “analysis.”Their eyes flash embarrassment and hope. Lab-coated “consultants” run electronic gizmos against their skin, indicating how many of what sort of Kiehl’s products they’ll need. (Answer: dozens.)

    Lines to pay. Slow moving ones. Photographers snap pictures. People are refilling their plates. Someone is trying to do interviews. People have shopping baskets that are loaded with “product”–an easy $100 per basket.

    I make my purchase: waiting time to do so, 20 minutes. I make my way out of the store. Lines are still forming. I realize I am part of this demonstration of capitalism at its very best, in BH, In America, in everyone’s head. In their DNA. And I flee.

  • AEB

    PS, I see myself in Karl’s vid. Can you spot me?

  • AnnofOrange

    Hilarious! Your best post ever!

  • Karl Junkersfeld


    You are truly a wordsmith. Pure poetry. Wish you would have said hi so I could have interviewed you.

    Wonderful summation about the day’s activity in Keihl’s. I especially loved your description of the individuals coming and going for the free food.

    One other thing I noticed was the Sephora phenomenon, whereby buyers unscrew the lids to some of the skin cremes and test it then close the lid and put it back on the shelf. Idiots. Don’t they understand that someone purchasing that product in the future doesn’t want their imprint on the creme. Kiehl’s is generous in dispensing samples. Caught it on camera but too disgusting to include in film.

    AEB, you and nabeguy are the best.

  • AEB

    Thanks, Karl! If I had seen you, I would have said–shouted–hello.

  • Heightsman

    I can give a shout-out for their amino acid shampoo. That and the bars of soap are a staple in my house. Keep in mind they are owned by L’Oreal. Not judging but definitely not family run since 2000.

  • David on Middagh

    At least three times! 00:55, 1:35, 3:10—you weren’t kidding about the wait, were you?

  • AEB

    David, did you notice how I’d aged from 00:55 to 3:10? Several lifetimes, at least.

  • David on Middagh

    NO! Your skin looks great.